The last time I visited Florina in north-western Greece, I was introduced by my brother to a man named Alexandros*. Florina is the remote mountain town where I was born, not far from the borders with Albania and the Republic of North Macedonia, and where my brother still lives in our ancestral home.
Alexandros was walking a mangy sheepdog through Florina’s tight streets when we met. He was a convivial older chap who looked to be in his 70s with a thick rush of snowy white hair and ruby red cheeks. We invited him to sit and join us for an espresso at the kafenion by the river.
Alexandros lives in the nearby Prespa region that features two large lakes crossing international borders. My brother offered Alexandros an American cigarette, which he accepted gratefully.
Florina in Greece. Source: Peter Papathanasiou
“My original name is actually Aleksandra, when I was a woman in Albania,” Alexandros said. “I only adopted the masculine name at the same time as the masculine values.”
Slightly confused, I asked if Alexandros had gender transitioned.
He chuckled. “No,” he replied. “I’m just a ‘sworn virgin’.”
My brother sipped a tall frappé coffee and lit his own smoke. “It all happened such a long time ago that frankly no one around here gives it a second thought anymore,” he said.
Alexandros explained how sworn virgins were women who opted to live as men to broaden the opportunities available to them in a patriarchal society. The price was a lifetime of virginity and chastity. In short, Aleksandra became a man because it was better to be a man than a woman in that part of the world at the time. It meant avoiding servitude and social restrictions. The switch was a social construct and not related to gender identity or sexuality.
Peter Papathanasiou (right) with his brother in Florina. Source: Vasilios Paraskevaidis
“There were also some personal circumstances at play,” my brother said. “In Aleksandra’s family, the only male heir, a brother, died in a blood feud, stabbed to death in a vengeance killing.”
Alexandros crossed himself at the mention of his brother. “His tragic death meant that property could no longer be passed on in patrilineal fashion,” Alexandros said. “Because I was a virgin daughter, I was able to assume the role of patriarch by swearing a pledge of lifelong celibacy in front of the village elders.”
Governed by , the oath that Aleksandra took in her early 20s secured the family estate and honour.
“But she was forced to become Alexandros,” my brother said. “This meant dressing like a man, working like a man, and assuming both the liberties and burdens of a man. And because a woman who became a sworn virgin wasn’t seen as entirely male, Alexandros was spared the blood feud and being murdered by a rival clan.”
“I got lucky,” Alexandros said. “I’d be dead by now.
“Today, I am who I am, and don’t know anything else. I’ve always spat and smoked and cursed and sat with legs uncrossed. Moving and dressing like a man has become second nature now. What femininity I once had is like Greek ruins – ancient history.”
Because I was a virgin daughter, I was able to assume the role of patriarch by swearing a pledge of lifelong celibacy in front of the village elders
The change happened “years ago”, according to my brother. “My parents might have remembered it, but I don’t. To me, Alexandros has always been a man. Having male genitals isn’t what makes you a man. People who didn’t understand the practice used to tease poor Alexandros and call him a lesbian in disguise.”
Most women who became sworn virgins did so to protect the family. It was a choice of practicality, not happiness. They became a legitimate .
“By declaring myself to be a man, I was striking out at gender norms, not submitting to them,” Alexandros said. “I was trying to find a place and purpose in both my family and my country that otherwise offered me none.”
The more Alexandros spoke, the more I realised that being a sworn virgin was less about becoming a man in a paternalistic society and more about achieving a new physicality almost without gender. What may have once been seen as a form of resignation was now powerful and commanding.
“These days, the practice is dying out,” my brother said. “There’s only a handful of sworn virgins left, .”
Peter Papathanasiou. Source: Rowena Hains
“We’re like a lost Amazonian tribe,” Alexandros said proudly. “More myth than reality. In the modern world, women have more freedoms, they no longer need to become sworn virgins.”
He looked across at my brother. “Did you hear about the newest kafenion to open in Florina?”
“No,” my brother replied. “What about it?”
Alexandros extinguished his cigarette in the ashtray and smiled knowingly. “. Men are only allowed entry if escorted by a woman. It’s the only one of its kind in Greece. It flips the script completely!”
*Name has been changed
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