Earlier this year, I celebrated my birthday for the first time since moving to Melbourne from the Philippines. It was my second birthday in the city, technically. But since I was stuck in lockdown alone last year with no one to really celebrate with, I told myself it didn’t count.
This year, my birthday month began once again in lockdown. But by some stroke of luck, restrictions eased at 11.59pm — a minute before my birthday. Caught by surprise, I was at a loss on how to celebrate.
I have a birthday eve ritual of making a gratitude list of all the blessings in the past year. The number of things corresponds to my age. If I were turning 40, it would be a list of 40 things I’m grateful for. This year, however, the list was much harder. I love birthdays, and I wanted so much to be happy. But after nearly 200 days of lockdown on my own, my emotions finally caught up with me. Even if I did find things to be grateful for, I couldn’t wish away my birthday blues.
Then on the afternoon of my birthday, my British neighbour delivered me a bigger surprise than he could’ve planned. He gifted me with a cake he baked. It was an unexpected gesture — not just because of his kindness, but also because the reverse happens in the Philippines.
Back home, the birthday celebrant is expected to be the one giving out treats. On your special day, everyone would chide ‘Libre!’, which literally means ‘free’ or ‘treat’. You would buy family, friends and colleagues a cake, some snacks, a drink or even a meal on your birthday — a tradition that’s all about giving thanks.
Discovering that the opposite happens in Australia was a thrilling surprise. That night, a friend bought me dinner. In true Filipino fashion, I suggested eating noodles. Why noodles? It’s auspicious to have sprawling, uncut noodles on your birthday to ensure a long, healthy life. This year was no exception.
Why noodles? It’s auspicious to have sprawling, uncut noodles on your birthday to ensure a long, healthy life.
When I returned home that evening I heard a gentle knock on the door. My Indonesian neighbour had made me a bowl of noodles with a single hard-boiled egg.
“You need noodles and egg for your birthday,” she said. Turns out birthday noodles is also a tradition in her culture, and she lovingly thought we might do the same thing in the Philippines. “Nothing fancy, just Indomie and egg,” she said shyly. In her Chinese-Indonesian heritage, red eggs are traditionally given on birthdays. Eggs symbolise a new start, and red symbolise prosperity and good fortune for the Chinese. Her thoughtful gesture melted my heart.
It was then that I realised it doesn’t matter where you are, or how you are feeling on your birthday, there’s something about honouring our birthday traditions that make us feel special. This year I also learnt to give myself permission to be treated by others — embracing all of the unexpected gestures of kindness that helped softened the blow of lockdown.
Soon it was my Indonesian neighbour’s birthday. I’d planned to bake her something and asked her husband what kind of cake she liked. When he responded that she didn’t like sweets, I decided to make her a birthday Mie Goreng instead. I put together the Indonesian-style noodles with what I had in my pantry: garlic, tofu, cabbage, bean sprouts, and ribbon eggs. I added carrots the way we do with Pancit Canton, our Filipino noodle dish. Soon, my house smelled just like my parents' home. I’d made my friend a delicious plate of Mie Goreng, which looked a lot like the Filipino dish my mother loves.
When it was done, I knocked on my neighbour’s door and handed her the bowl of freshly cooked Mie Goreng.
I brought the garnish over to my neighbour, who opened the door with her mouth full. “I’m eating it already,” she said with a smile.
“Happy birthday,” I said. Her eyes lit up. But when I got back to my apartment, I realised I had left out the egg ribbon in my excitement. I brought the garnish over to my neighbour, who opened the door with her mouth full. “I’m eating it already,” she said with a smile. It’s probably not as spicy as the Mie Goreng she’s used to, and not as authentic. But I sensed it made her happy.
I can get used to this Australian style of celebrating birthdays. For one day a year, it’s healthy to be on the receiving end — to be showered with love and kindness. To my surprise, the treats continued days after my birthday. Now I’m convinced that no matter what else is happening in the world, there’s always room for a little celebrating.
