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Bridget and Craig know how a tragic loss feels. At their cafe, grief is talked about openly
When 11-year-old Veronique Sakr died in a car crash alongside her three cousins, the lives of two families changed forever. As Christmas approaches, here’s how one couple is giving back.
Published 23 December 2023 6:45am
Updated 27 December 2023 3:21pm
By Sandra Fulloon
Source: SBS
Image: Craig Mackenzie and Bridget Sakr at their Sydney cafe. (SBS / Sandra Fulloon)
Lunch service is in full swing at a small cafe in suburban Sydney. Called Quatre, French for four, the cafe honours outside a western Sydney golf course nearly four years ago.
Greeting guests is Bridget Sakr, the mother of 11-year-old Veronique, who died alongside her three cousins when a car mounted the kerb in the suburb of Oatlands.
“You’re triggered, especially around Christmas — the emptiness of not having your daughter around you,” she says. “The dinner table is never the same.
“In fact, grief never goes away and it doesn't discriminate, especially traumatic grief. That shock is very much misunderstood. People think you move on, but you don't. You move with it.”
Bridget Sakr and her daughter Veronique. Source: Supplied / Bridget Sakr.
It has become a safe space for others to meet and grieve.
"You come into the cafe with a photo of your loved one, and we will take a photo of you and your loved one and pin it to the wall," Sakr says.
"And it's a way of honouring the person you love and continuing that bond with them."
Quatre Cafe with its memorial wall. Source: SBS / Sandra Fulloon
"We are really happy that when people come into our cafe, they see family and friends, they greet each other, they sit together," Mackenzie says.
"It is a communal space for people to find and give support."
It is a message embraced by first-time customer Sue Marendy.
Quatre Cafe customer Sue Marendy. Source: SBS / Sandra Fulloon
"So, for me to find a place like this to come and share my story, and meet other like-minded people, it gives me strength."
Customer Elsa Manu agrees: “Definitely hope and love, that is what you get from coming here.
“I mean, we live in a world that’s broken and we all go through some form of grief. But if you come into the cafe and see the pictures, you feel connected.
“And leading up to Christmas, it is that message of hope that you can get through the storms of life, especially through faith.”
Bridget Sakr serves cakes with kindness. Source: SBS / Sandra Fulloon
"Forgiveness is core to our Christian faith and is really, really important,” she says.
"It has helped me to have no anger, and not hold hatred, but to show love. And by showing love, I'm being a better mother, I'm being a better daughter, I'm being a better wife.
"That does not mean that there is no anxiety, that does not mean there is no post-traumatic stress, because there are so many triggers when it comes to grief.
"Around Christmas, there is such an emptiness going shopping and buying gifts, without the love that your child gives you. But the forgiveness helps you cope, it really does.”
The couple recently hosted the parents of the driver serving a prison sentence for killing Veronique and her cousins Sienna, Angelina and Antony Abdallah outside Oatlands Golf Club near Parramatta in February 2020.
“If we didn't have the forgiveness in our hearts, we couldn't do that,” Sakr says.
Craig Mackenzie at Quatre Cafe. Source: SBS / Sandra Fulloon
This community-focused venture is celebrated by Small Business and Family Enterprise Ombudsman Bruce Billson, who said it was a "central part of connectedness within a community".
“It has become a solemn place and a place where people can find each other to grieve and navigate their loss,” he added.
Customer Cullen Haynes says Quatre "is a cafe with a meaning and a purpose, helping the community to remember lost loved ones. The sign on the wall 'Because Love Lives On' says it all."
After a long campaign, the crash site in Oatlands will soon become a memorial to the four young victims.
“It is a garden under a tree where the four kids came to rest,” Mackenzie says.
The crash site in Oatlands will soon be a memorial garden. Source: Supplied / Craig Mackenzie
"It is a sad place, no doubt about it, but that garden will soon become a more beautiful, peaceful and positive place."
Sakr also runs Heartfelt, an online prayer group that actively supports those devastated by loss.
"Heartfelt is a safe space where people come together, to honour their loved one. Relationships are formed, trust is built."
Mackenzie is also pushing for reform for the families of crash victims, through the NSW Road Trauma Support Group.
"We support people who have lost loved ones on the roads due to the criminal act of another person,” he says.
"We are there to be their voice, to be their advocate. We are there to educate people about the impact of road trauma.”
As Christmas approaches, Sakr says faith and family have helped her get through the hardest times.
“Community and family and faith are very, very important. They're fundamental,” she says.
“We're all going to suffer in some shape or form, but you're never alone. I really believe that the blessings come in many ways.
