Phoebe remembers the huge feasts of her Singaporean childhood, lovingly prepared by her grandmother, with a smile.
But not so long ago, the very thought of family mealtimes induced chest-thumping panic in the now 23-year-old.
For almost a decade of her life in Perth, Phoebe lived in what she calls her “eating disorder bubble” - a seemingly endless cycle of anorexia and bulimia, recovery and relapse.
Her parents struggled to understand what was happening.
“I couldn’t articulate how I was feeling and what my experiences were to them because emotions weren’t something that we talked a lot about in Singaporean culture,” Phoebe told SBS News.
“I don’t think they had [any] idea what eating disorders were.
Phoebe developed an eating disorder after moving to Australia. Source: Supplied
“Just the look on their face ... they felt helpless.”
Phoebe’s family migrated to Perth when she was nine.
“I struggled to make friends and to keep friends and to try to fit in. I really felt that I didn’t have that sense of belonging. I felt like I was the odd one out,” she said.
Grasping for a sense of control, she began dieting aged 12.
“Gradually it became this complete restriction of food.”
Not fitting into his new country is also one of TJ’s earliest memories.
He was five when he arrived in Melbourne from Sri Lanka.
“As a little boy ... I knew that I looked quite different to everyone else,” the 26-year-old said.
“It was something that I was quite ashamed of. I just wanted to fit in with my peers and the easiest way that I found to do that was to really hide being Sri Lankan.”
TJ started worrying about his appearance again around 17 when he moved to university without his trusted school mates.
“I started to lose weight and my physical appearance changed drastically,” he said.
His mother and sister convinced him to speak to the family doctor and it led to a diagnosis he wasn’t prepared for.
“That was the first time that I really heard the words ‘anorexia nervosa’ in a setting that wasn’t watching it online, or watching it on the news when it was focused on young women,” he said.
“I was thinking, ‘but I don’t look anything like the people that are mentioned when we’re talking about things like eating disorders’.”
New campaign to tackle stereotypes
National eating disorders charity the Butterfly Foundation says the stereotype that eating disorders only happen to young, white, middle-class women is stubbornly hard to shift, even among health professionals.
“About one in ten Australians will experience an eating disorder in their life, but so many of them might not see themselves as having a problem because they don’t fit that stereotype,” said Amelia Trinick, a clinician and team leader on Butterfly’s National Helpline.
“Only a quarter of people experiencing an eating disorder actually get the support they deserve, and that number drops quite significantly for someone who doesn’t fit that stereotype.”
Appealing to more diverse communities is a focus of Butterfly’s new campaign, Talking Helps, encouraging the one million Australians living with an eating disorder to seek support.
The campaign will launch on Thursday.
Its provides information in 23 languages and the National Translation and Interpreting Service is available on its free and confidential helpline.
While eating disorders don’t discriminate, the treatment sometimes can by failing to reflect a person’s culture, health experts say.
Mental health professor Phillipa Hay from the University of Western Sydney supports Butterfly’s new campaign, saying healthcare professionals need to be culturally sensitive.
She cites her own experience of treating those with eating disorders in western Sydney’s Muslim community.
“When I first started working in this area I made assumptions that people during Ramadan couldn’t break the fast. But in fact, they can, with permission from their communities, from their religious leaders,” Professor Hay said.
“I was very privileged because [at UWS] I have colleagues from those communities, so they can advise me.”
Butterfly says the clash between a person’s traditional and adopted cultures can increase their risk of an eating disorder, as can prolonged exposure to Western ideals of shape and size.
Sarah McMahon, Director of BodyMatters Australasia, agrees treatment must be tailored to a person’s cultural background.
“There are so many physical attributes we can’t control,” Ms McMahon said.
“Weight loss and thinness are so often celebrated and glorified that it’s a positive reinforcing experience, particularly for someone who feels like they are different.
“It transcends cultural difference because they are achieving what young people from more mainstream backgrounds cherish.
“One consistent challenge we see people from diverse backgrounds experience is that they often have no examples of people with eating disorders, let alone examples of recovery, that they can relate to,” Ms McMahon said.
“Having people share their stories from different backgrounds is really important so that people can see and identify that if they have something going on for them, there is support available,” Butterfly’s Ms Trinick said.
Phoebe and TJ are both champions of Butterfly’s new campaign and say recovery is possible.
They both credit empathetic professionals with their recovery and now work in mental health, drawing on their experience to help others.
“I am leading a very fulfilling, very purposeful, very meaningful life and I’m loving what I’m doing,” Phoebe said.
As TJ describes it, “I never saw anyone that looked like me on TV or in the media talking about mental health, let alone an eating disorder.
“It’s nothing to be ashamed about and talking truly does help.”
Daniela Ritorto is a freelance writer based in Adelaide.
Anyone needing support with eating disorders or body image issues is encouraged to contact Butterfly via its national helpline on 1800 33 4673, its , or via email on . The Eating Disorders Victoria Helpline is 1300 550 23. For urgent support call Lifeline on 13 11 14.
