Trans mum: 'We are also capable of loving and rearing kids'

Trans mum Sofiya Huggins believes that transsexual women should be considered mothers too.

Maia and Sofiya

Source: Supplied- Sofiya

While doing backpacking trips around Australia, Ms Sofiya Huggins met someone who was able to sponsor her for an Australian student visa.

Not long after, the man who helped her get the visa became her partner in life.

“I studied so I can land on a very good university lecturing job back home [Philippines] that was my plan until I met my husband," Ms Huggins says.
The day Sofiya got her degree in master communication studies, March 2010 at the University of Western Australia
The day Sofiya got her degree in master communication studies, March 2010 at the University of Western Australia Source: Supplied- Sofiye
Shortly after becoming a couple in 2009, the two held a public affirmation of their commitment to one another.

"I call him husband we did a commitment ceremony in Kings Park in 2010 and I was wearing this pineapple fibre wedding dress," Ms Huggins says.

Since the beginning of their relationship, Ms Huggins had already promised her Australian partner a child as a token of gratitude for giving her an opportunity to live in Australia.

"He helped and he made my dreams come true - I mean being Australian," Ms Huggins says.
Sofiya and Nic's commitment ceremony at the old tea pavilion in Frazier Avenue, Kings park. January 30, 2010.
Sofiya and Nic's commitment ceremony at the old tea pavilion in Frazier Avenue, Kings park. January 30, 2010. Source: Supplied- Sofiye

Surrogacy, their option

After a failed intrauterine insemination, Ms Huggins and her partner gave surrogacy another try by seeking the help of a Sydney accredited and Cebu-based IVF expert.

“I wrote to a very well-known and prominent IVF clinic [Dr Marivic Tan]. She is known all over Asia to have a very successful program for IVF," she says.

Ms Huggins was adamant that an IVF procedure would occur despite the fertility expert being a devout Christian. 

“I was taking chances because she [doctor] is a very devout and practising Catholic so I don’t know if she’s going to have a go but might as well just try,” Ms Huggins says.

One week later, a piece of good news knocked on her door and this made her jump for joy. 

According to the doctor's response, studies have shown that same-sex couples raise the best children and she was not going to stop the couple from realising their dreams.

After finding a surrogate mother in Cebu, the in vitro fertilisation took place immediately. 

In their case, her partner's sperm and the surrogate's egg were used to create the embryo of the child through in vitro fertilisation or IVF since she cannot produce egg as a transsexual woman.

Ms Huggins is proud to say that although she did not carry the child, she was greatly involved in all the other aspects especially in financing the whole procedure.

"There is no other documented or known situation where an ordinary transsexual woman worked hard and paid for everything.”

What matters for Ms Huggins is repaying her partner's kindness.

"That is my way of saying thank you for making my dreams come true [living in Australia] and now [it’s my turn]. I will make your life happy," Ms Huggins says.
Maia Louise Huggins christening at the Mactan Airbase Chapel on June 2013.
Maia Louise Huggins christening at the Mactan Airbase Chapel on June 2013. Source: Supplied- Sofiye

Trans mum vs biological mum

Ms Huggins strongly believes that being a mother is not measured through blood connection, but a well-founded relationship is far more important.

“I believe it’s not about the blood it’s about the relationship that you establish at the end of the day,” she says.

Ms Huggins nursed the baby 24/7 while the biological mum only held the baby for a few minutes after she was born. 

“I was the one feeding her when she was kept in the nursery for 10 days.”
Sofiya and daughter Maia Louise Huggins.
Sofiya and daughter Maia Louise Huggins. Source: Supplied- Sofiya
Ms Huggins did not conceal the truth to her now five-year old daughter, Maia Louise Huggins. 

Her daughter is fully aware that her mum is a transsexual woman and that she was carried in the womb by a woman she does not know.

“The only thing is that you do not lie to them and I am not stopping my child from recognising the biological mother,” she said.

“Maybe in the future, she will know who her biological mother is."

Ms Huggins is willing to sacrifice anything to properly raise her daughter.

“Once you have a daughter even though we were established through the relationship I will give my life for her,” Ms Huggins said.
Sofiya with her partner and daughter
Sofiya with her partner and daughter. Source: Supplied- Sofiye

Breaking the transsexual stigma

Ms Huggins hopes that her story will inspire others and break the stigma on transsexual women.

“We are not just sex objects. We are also people who are capable of loving and rearing good kids. We have [also] a mother’s instinct,” says Ms Huggins.

She also wants her fellow transsexual women to recognise that there's more to life than just glamour.

“It’s all about being a person, being you and that’s when we can relate and be familiar to the rest of the community and society.”

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5 min read
Published 2 March 2019 12:18pm
Updated 7 March 2019 2:35pm
By Claudette Centeno-Calixto


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